Step into the middle of this board room conversation …”I learned my wife doesn’t care about getting gifts or flowers, she wants me to help out around the house. Oh, not my girlfriend, if I don’t tell her how special she is to me all the time, she thinks something is wrong!” After several female board members piped in about what their beliefs were about their husbands and partners preferences, someone suggesting reading   The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman.

Being a consultant who works with companies with people conflict, I pondered on the “appreciation languages” of my consulting client’s employees…or even the  Texas Women Rockers?  

How many times had I interviewed employees who were starved for recognition from their manager? Research had reported countless times that money was not a motivator, so what could an employer do?  Most look to books for an idea list of recognition methods, without any idea of what would speak to the individual. 

If Dr. Chapman’s ideas work for love, how about for business?

With my apologies to Dr. Chapman, how about a quiz which flagged the primary way our employees want to be recognized at work?  Select your number 1 and number 2 preferred mentod of appreciation from the choices below.

APPRECIATION LANGUAGE QUIZ

I feel most valued when a person/manager/co-worker:

 ______Tells me how grateful they are for me and the things I do for them or the company

 ______ Gives me their focused attention without any interruptions

 ______Brings me a gift or other tangible item of appreciation

 ______Pitches in to help me, perhaps taking over something that I’m behind on or find routine or boring

 ______Expresses positive feelings through acceptable physical contact- like a pat on the back, high-5 or knuckle bump

To learn more about your style, go to Pat Dolen  for the “rest of the story”.

Yes, I admit…I am a gold star addict. I want to tell you how motivated I am by long range results that occur somewhere in the next decade, except it is not true. It is the daily “atta-a-girls” I get from my newly created point system.

Do you work with a coach? Well, I do. She knows my strengths and gaps. Yep, she’s got me “profiled” and knows how I am hard-wired. She can recognize when I begin to slide on some of those daily production tasks when they are not my favorites. As I review my checklist, there is certainly one area I’ll want to avoid…Consulting…favorite! Executive coaching…favorite! Speaking…favorite! Prospecting calls…not as favorite!

How did my coach help me? By knowing me and my habits. Let me explain. There are 10 types of marketing, public relations or sales activities that I perform on a daily, weekly or monthly basis that lead to “revenue generated’. They include marketing campaigns, articles, blogging, prospecting contacts, networking, presentations, seminars, workshops, events and speaking events.

With the previous system, we carefully tallied the number of activities performed each week. Ho-hum. Numbers were not my motivator.  So, we devised a point system, where each task will generate points toward my daily goal of 50 points. How does the daily 50 help motivate me during the times I don’t feel like an Olympic Star?

1. Daily goals keep me on track upward!
2. Work stays interesting and fresh.
3. Choices bring flexibility and creativity.

So, I admit it. I love going for my gold stars every day…even though I hope you don’t tell. If you think it will work for you, devise your own system and maybe we’ll have our own gold star club together in the future.